All Aboard the Fail Train! (Note to Newbies)

Welcome to Sporks are Useless! A blog of random, useless, spork-like spam spontaneously posted by 2 authors, Hikari and Dancing Toast, twin girls with no lives, cranky and sarcastic attitudes, chaotically insane minds, and occasional violent mood swings. We will be responsible for making your visit to XXYYZ-I as frightening entertaining as possible.
Enjoy your stay at Sporks Are Useless and check out the blogs we follow on our profile!
See you on the dark side of the moon!
~The Sporks Team, Hikari and DancingToast

Friday, October 29, 2010

Halloween is near!

Seriously, I don't even know why I'm posting 2 posts in one day. Maybe it's because I'm a loser.

Anyway, Halloween is coming, and you know what that means! Candy and costumes! Sounds fun, right?
Wrong. I don't really like Halloween. I like the free candy, I like the no-curfew, I like gallivanting around with friends, I like exchanging candy with friends (and going to their neighborhoods to trick-or-treat because my neighborhood is foreboding during Halloween), but it's just not good enough. Sorry if I've offended anyone, but I have a different opinion. If you don't want my opinion to affect you, you don't have to read this post.
First of all, I live in Florida. In Florida, it's hot all year, which may seem like paradise to snowbirds, but they soon find out it's not. Because in Florida, on top of it being hot (not warm, but HOT!), there's so much humidity, all the girls actually have to worry about their straightened hair curling in the middle of the day. And it's not comfortable to sweat in thin layers of sweat rather than in drops. Also, Florida + Fall/Autumn= Hot and Humid with a 100.1% chance of rain. Running around in heavy costumes for 2+ hours in that kind of weather... you get the idea.
Second of all, I live with Asian parents. They're cheap, and I can't sew, so I have to try to construct some sort of lame "costume." All the nice costumes are too hot to wear in the aforementioned hot weather. Maybe I should be a tombstone, like what Older Sister was last year.
Thirdly, I have to walk around in that hot weather for 2 (and most likely more) hours, so I get hungry and sweaty. I eat some cheap, gooey, non-refreshing candy to ignore my hunger for real food, and it's probably the only time I feel uncomfortable enough to feel sick eating candy. Usually, I don't feel sick eating candy at all (even when I eat a lot), and when I eat the candy to stop the hunger, it's only 1-3 pieces. And sometimes, I feel paranoid that some stranger has poisoned my candy, but there's no way of telling if it is or not. Also, after walking around for a long time for the desired amount of candy, Older Sister yells at me throughout the year that I'm weird because I hoard the candy. I'm sorry if I don't feel like eating candy often, and what if I want some, and there is none?Parents won't buy me any, so stop making me feel even weirder than I already do, Older Sister! And I don't want to stay home either, because it's boring, I feel more antisocial than I already do, my parents don't go to the door for kids because they're too lazy to open it every time a kid ding-dongs, and I want to have a variety of candy that I can't get and can only get on Halloween because my parents don't buy me candy, and no one visit our house because it's in the back of the neighborhood.
So generally, I don't like Halloween. But you don't have to share the same opinion.
Even after expressing my reasons why I don't like Halloween, I still look forward to it every year. I'm weird. Maybe I should get a therapist for my mixed feelings. I have so many, and surprisingly, blogging clears them up, so Sporkers, bear with my rantings.

I just realized that I'm a loser.

Why? Because yesterday was an early release day, so Hikari and I finally had some time to slack off by playing on the computer. Hikari was fixing up the deviantART messages, and to hide that she was doing that, she would watch BrainPOP whenever Older Sister came by. I had turned off my computer because was used to turning it off to sleep at curfew time, but I forgot that there was no school the next day, so I just sat next to Hikari, watching her do stuff on her computer. I realized that, while other kids my age were bashing their heads playing football or watching TV until their brains ooze out of their ears, I'm sitting next to my sister, watching educational videos and popping pomegranate seeds into my mouth instead of popcorn.
We watched Pride & Prejudice (Keira Knightley version) last night, too. Surprisingly, it was very good. But I wouldn't want to read it, because it was written way-back-when they wrote boringly, so just the movie is fine.

Our neighborhood used to have a stupid dog.
It used to bark at anything that passed by its fence. Hikari & I walking home, squirrels on its fence, etc. And then it would bark at the joggers at night.
it would bark for soooo long...but then one day, it stopped. I guess the old couple who owned it got sick of its barking, or got yelled at too much by other people, or moved away, or it died.
But hey, at least when the crazy teenager tried to sing his horrible rock really loudly, it didn't like it either. I was 10 years old. It was 10:39 p.m. A college teenager had his stereos' sound up to the max, he was singing horribly and so off-key, accompanied by his guitar-playing skills he managed to drege up from his memories since he was 8. The dog barked nonstop along with him to make him shut up. After repeatedly teling my dad that I couldn't sleep due to the guy and the dog, my dad agreed that the guy was annoying, and that he would give the guy a piece of his mind. When my dad came home, he said that the neighborhood police guy made him shut up.

Wow. Rereading this post make me feel even more like a loser. Not only do I do abnormal things for kids my age, I also like cheesy old movies, and I talk about my life. I'll stop now.