All Aboard the Fail Train! (Note to Newbies)

Welcome to Sporks are Useless! A blog of random, useless, spork-like spam spontaneously posted by 2 authors, Hikari and Dancing Toast, twin girls with no lives, cranky and sarcastic attitudes, chaotically insane minds, and occasional violent mood swings. We will be responsible for making your visit to XXYYZ-I as frightening entertaining as possible.
Enjoy your stay at Sporks Are Useless and check out the blogs we follow on our profile!
See you on the dark side of the moon!
~The Sporks Team, Hikari and DancingToast

Wednesday, September 30, 2009

Caps lock!♥

By the way, it was DANCING TOAST who changed the "people who actually noticed" thingummy-whatsit at the bottom. NOTICE HOW I SAY PEOPLE INSTEAD OF PERSON. I ALSO FIND THAT IF I PUT ON CAPS LOCK, YOU WILL FIND MY MESSAGE MORE URGENT TO READ.
Okay, stopping now. Do you think Sporks needs a new layout? Just go to the little link I'm putting on right now. ---> Comment links that you think suits Sporks!
Okay so I lurve mah friend Yuki (and this is her nickname anyway, so I don't have to worry about cyber-stalkers), who is much like my friend, and penpal, Muse of Randomness! Only differences are that I see Yuki all the time and she is my age and she doesn't know about Sporks; Muse is pen-buddy, knows about Sporks, and 2 years older. Both of you guys are awesome!!!♥♥♥ Hearts are not less than three, they are your life and alt3.
Nickel, stop being a sir. We introduced you as Nickel, not Sir Nickel.
End of teh post. Byee!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

Sunshine's Sick! Sorry!

Random Fact: When you die your hair still grows for a couple of months.
Sorry ya'll. I didn't post yesterday bc im sick. wahh. I missed my chance. check pwd. i may post there.
We have a new follower it seems, and thanks purplehoodiechick for the awards!
I feel like poop.
(ps, the sporks schedule: Monday-Hikari, Wednesday-toast, Fridays-Sunshine. The days in between will be left empty so that ya'll can read the posts)

Sunday, September 20, 2009

I forgot what awesome title I thought up...

April showers bring may flowers, and eating apple slices while typing brings typos.
Random fact: The mucus coming out of your nose when you sneeze is coming out at 95 miles per hour.
I am getting closer my friend, "R" ever since middle school started. And apparently we have finally been reunited with a kindergarten classmate after all these years. "R" is not the same person... I didn't even know he still lived in the state. He probably doesn't recognize meh. Ah well. He's short, btw.

Apparently there's such thing as "snubing." It's a cross between snorkling and scuba diving. Speaking of scuba diving:
"Glub glub, glub glub."
"Oh God, it's you guys. And you're floating."
"We're not floating, Charlie, we're scuba diving, Charlie!"
"Scuba diviiiinnggg"
XD Anyone remember that? Or have seen that? No? Fine. Be that way. Even if I ask that question, no one will answer. Remember Sunshine's post? PWD gets more comments than Sporks!! That proves nobody likes me or Toast! Read her post! And Sunshine changed the comments thing to "people who actually noticed this post". Usually, that number is, no surprise, zero! What do you have to say for yourselves??

Okay, Sunshine has devised a schedule for Sporks. Here:
Sunday: New poll
Monday: Hikari
Tuesday: BLANK
Wednesday: Dancing Toast
Thursday: BLANK
Friday: FlossingSunshine
Saturday: BLANK
This schedule is so that Sporks is less chaotic, and so that people will get the chance to read each post and hopefully comment. Only if it's really urgent does someone interrupt the schedule.

Tell us what you think!!

Sunday, September 13, 2009

The Top Sporks Editors Competiton!

^okay so its not a competition cuz 2 of the editors didnt know about it^
^and also, i stutter like bella, naturally now. TWILIGHT TOOK OVER MY BRAIN. I'M READING ECLIPSE. help me^
SO TODAY, I typed up the amount of comments each spork poster has gotten ever. Every Post we have documented, i typed up and put it into an online calculator. THE RESULTS ARE IN!
WHO IS IT YOU LIKE MOST?? ( as of before this post)
(note, im not sure all of these are extremely accurate, but close)
At number 3 with 66 comments ever, is FlossingSunshine
At number 2, with 91 comments ever, is DancingToast
At Number 1, with 100 comments ever, is Hikari
BY THE WAY!! Dancing Toast, congrats, you Hold all of our comment records EVER. including 5 comments, 6 comments and 7 comments on 1 post. Good job.
also, thanks to xnerdie and raliravioli, who never got comments, but were part of the old sporks team.
I feel extremely fail-full right now. Anyways we'll be sending out thanks messages soon...

I fail!,

Saturday, September 12, 2009


Does nobody notice that me and Hikari posted? Nobody notices stuff when we actually do stuff, or at least that's what it feels like because no one comments on our posts anymore!
Do you hate us or some thing?? I'm so sad to see that I posted a hugelongparagraph for nothing and this post will probably be ignored too. Might as well quit being a blogger since no one lurves us anymore...
See?! Look at what you did! I'm feeling all sad when Planet XXYYZ-I is supposed to be a place of happiness and Sunshine. It's just like what Hikari said IN THE POST YOU ALL IGNORED, that HAPPINESS IS NOWHERE. Waaahhh!! >0<" I don't like being sad! Dancing Toast only dances when they're happy! And now you've all condemned them to Limp(ing) Toast! WHAT DO YOU HAVE TO SAY FOR YOURSELVES???DO YOU FEEL ASHAMED NOW?? Good. Because you're supposed to! Hmph! No! No! N-n-no no! I'm not listening to you! You can't say stuff to me like that! Wh-wh- no no! See?? Now you're making me stammer like Bella in that movie Twilight. Stupid stupid stupid. Waaahhh!!! Hope you all feel good about how you made my life ABSOLUTELY MISERABLE.

Friday, September 11, 2009

It's A scary world out there!

You know its a scary world when'
1) Michael Jackson and Billy Mays have died
2) Britney Spears has a whole "Circus themed" tour (we luv ya brit!)
3) Miley Cyrus's 'party in the USA' beat out 'I gotta feeling' on iTunes most popular. (IGF is lyk 3 PIUSA is 1)
4) POLISHED WITH DUST gets more comments than SPORKS ARE USELESS!

Come on, #4 guys, rly? How could my personal blog get more than the 3 amigos.
Anyways, if sporks is so boring, I'll talk to Hikari and Spaghetti and we can find a theme for this blog, and maybe find a new layout.

If Sporks is getting old and boring, tell us, please!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009


As you can all guess(or not), I'm posting!
This is Toast here! I know, I know, I haven't posted in a long time. But hey! I got a new friend at school. She kinda reminds me of Muse. Also, what have you at the sentence fragment of "red giraffes, purple cows, blue monkeys, and flying green goats"?!
Whee-hee! You've been puddingforked! Pudding forked is neither noun nor verb nor adjective!It is neither bad nor good! It just is! So, go up to random people, wave your hands in their face/head (depending on whether or not you're tall or short) and say, "you've been pudding forked" in a mystic voice.This all started when Sunshine had to eat her pudding with a fork.
Well, I dunno about yew, but I am in the 3rd week of 6th grade! And truth be told (♪the truth be told, I'm star-ting, to wo-rry, about rain!♫), I'm slightly disappointed and frustrated at it, what with all the extra homework and heavy backpacks. But who am I to complain now? The rest of the week we have testing, and the teachers are merciful enough to say we have no homework because we study the bats the whole day. Poor bats, they're all cooped up in them high-tech Planet XXYYZ-I habitat bubble-cages. Habitat bubble-cages are -blank- animals' habitats in bubbles! Endless space in those couch-pillow sized bubbles, specially made for -blank- animals!

Also, Sunshine and I have started Hogwarts! We have Time-Turners in order to have normal classes and magics classes. Nickle belongs in Hufflepuff, but he lies and says he's in Gryffindor.
I'mma buy more cream now, the cream slayers are doing who-knows-what to it. Byeeee~

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Okay, Alright, Fine!

Geez, I'm posting.

As Sunshine said, Toast and I have our birthdays on Friday! *confetti explodes out of nowhere* I hate it when that happens in movies and video games. Stuff comes out of nowhere all the time.
Apparently, mosquitoes tend to favor people who are very stressed out. Ooh, about the word 'nowhere": It can mean something really happy or something quite morbid. Watch:


"Happiness is now here." Happy.
"Happiness is nowhere." Morbid.