All Aboard the Fail Train! (Note to Newbies)

Welcome to Sporks are Useless! A blog of random, useless, spork-like spam spontaneously posted by 2 authors, Hikari and Dancing Toast, twin girls with no lives, cranky and sarcastic attitudes, chaotically insane minds, and occasional violent mood swings. We will be responsible for making your visit to XXYYZ-I as frightening entertaining as possible.
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See you on the dark side of the moon!
~The Sporks Team, Hikari and DancingToast

Tuesday, January 18, 2011

Beneficial Organizations and Fear

That's a screenshot. I dunno why it didn't save the right size, but I'm sorry about the graininess; I had to enlarge it. Clicking on it will let you see it the size I wanted it to be. It's really fun, and you donate rice to places in need of food, like Haiti.

The World Wildlife Fund saves wildlife. Donating to them would be nice.
Look at what they did to Paris! You can see that the pandas are roped off.

Now to FEAR: Meme stolen from now we're living in the future.

Cross out the things you’re afraid of and put you’re score at the top.
  1. the dark
  2. staying single forever
  3. being a parent (I'd be an awesome parent. Harry Potter for bedtime stories!)
  4. giving birth (Geh! It's not so much the pain as the fear of killing it or the unattractiveness you acquire if you don't exercise the pregnancy weight you gained)
  5. being myself in front of others (Trust me, being me is the most awesome thing I'll ever do.)
  6. open space (WTH?)
  7. closed space
  8. heights (Holy crud, really high heights are frightening!)
  9. dogs (Only if they're rabid...?)
  10. birds
  11. fish
  12. spiders (For some reason, no. Unless they're venomous or just too large to squash.)
  13. flowers or other plants (WTH?)
  14. being touched (By pedophiles and strangers, yes. Hugs and stuff are fine.)
  15. fire (I want to be able to fire-bend.)
  16. deep water (I can swim.)
  17. snakes (Oh. My. Goodness am I afraid of snakes. Constrictors, venomous ones, etc. They all freak me out.)
  18. silk (What on Earth is that gonna do to you?)
  19. the ocean (It's a wonderland of life. Who am I to argue with Mother Nature? Even if it's home to parasites, jellyfish, poisonous animals, sea snakes, and all sorts of lovely beasties.)
  20. failure
  21. success
  22. thunder/lightning (I really don't understand the thunder problem. It's just the noise lightning makes.)
  23. frogs/toads (I don't understand this one either. I think they're adorable. Lizards, too.)
  24. my boyfriends/girlfriends dad (Don't have a boyfriend. Don't really want one.)
  25. boyfriends/girlfriends mom (Don't have a boyfriend. Don't really want one.)
  26. rats (I'm just afraid of the diseases and general gross they carry around. Not so much the messengers of death themselves.)
  27. jumping from high places (Oh my god. Nevereverever.)
  28. snow (Love it. A lot.)
  29. rain (Love it. A lot.)
  30. wind (Love it, but only when it's cool/cold. Preferable cold.)
  31. crossing hanging bridges (Yes! There were so many of these half-rotted things in China; I had no idea why some people were shaking them on purpose. Just walk across them as quickly as possible.)
  32. death (Not particularly. I just wanna know what happens to you afterward. Crowding around in some eternal mosh pit doesn't sound fun after the first hour.)
  33. heaven (If there was the slimmest chance that there was actually a place of eternal peace, why would you be afraid of it?)
  34. being robbed
  35. falling (Holy schmoly.)
  36. clowns (I understand they're trying to make a living, but this smile is only here to make them feel better. I don't think terror is my ideal way to be entertained.)
  37. dolls (Those freaking human- and baby-shaped dolls scare the crap out of me. Figuratively, but omfg. They're creepy, man! D: )
  38. large crowds of people (I don't think you understand what a "large crowd of people" is unless you go to China. And then cram onto a boat. On tour.)
  39. men (Only the pedos and rapists.)
  40. women (Only the pedos and rapists.)
  41. having great responsibilities
  42. doctors, including dentists (What's wrong with them? All they do is try to help you.)
  43. tornados (I don't really know. There's never really been any threat of them in my state.)
  44. hurricanes
  45. incurable diseases (No disease is incurable.)
  46. sharks (Stop making like a seal and they'll leave you alone.)
  47. friday the 13th (Stupid superstition.)
  48. ghosts
  49. poverty
  50. halloween (WTH?)
  51. school
  52. trains (Oh yeah, trains are totally going to run through my walls just to get at me. What kind of a fear is this??)
  53. odd numbers (W. T. F. )
  54. even numbers (WTH.)
  55. being alone (A little, actually. I've always been with someone, and having a twin just makes you all the more dependent, I guess.)
  56. becoming blind (Slightly. I'd miss colors, and if I were in chaos, who'd tell me I'm in danger?)
  57. becoming deaf (I already have glasses. If my sight deteriorates and I'm deaf...)
  58. growing up/old
  59. creepy noises in the night (Isn't this the main reason people are scared of the dark?)
  60. bee stings
  61. not accomplishing my dreams/goals (First try, then worry.)
  62. needles
  63. blood
  64. dinosaurs (If faced with a rampaging, carnivorous one, maybe.)
  65. the welcome mat (Pedos?)
  66. high speed
  67. throwing up (I know it's nasty and the stomach acid dissolves your teeth and stuff, but really?)
  68. falling in love
  69. super secrets (I don't understand what this is. Is it like "your dad's a spy and you never knew and now you have to avenge his death", or is it "I've been cheating on you for the last few years, I've never actually loved you, so I'll leave you impregnated with my child and your furious parents"?)
I am afraid of 10 things. How 'bout you?

If you repost this, it’s been requested that you title it “I’m afraid of _ out of 69 common fears”
If you get more than 30, I strongly recommend some counseling.
If you get more than 20, you’re paranoid. (Wait, this isn't even the right case to use the word "paranoid" in!)
If you get 10-20, you are normal.
If you get 10 or less, you’re fearless.
People who don’t have any are liars.

Adios, amigas!

2 people actually love us.:

Sharkie said...

Hahahahah love this! Buy one of my best friends Stella Luna's t-shirtrs, and all of the money goes to the WWF, vie been an activist in it for a long ti e, but I still think that we can do so much more!!!!

Red Sunshine said...

well...pardon me for being afraid of silk. LOLJK
Lemme see what im afraid of from that list
1. the dark
2. heights
3.dogs (don't mock me. big dogs r scary)
8.odd numbers...loljk!!
9.becoming deaf
10. i dont like blood, it makes me dizzy, but i dont fear it

so i guess 8 things? and im supposed to be in gryffindor :]
i also terribly afraid of bugs. roaches scare the crud out of me. and king ramses.