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Welcome to Sporks are Useless! A blog of random, useless, spork-like spam spontaneously posted by 2 authors, Hikari and Dancing Toast, twin girls with no lives, cranky and sarcastic attitudes, chaotically insane minds, and occasional violent mood swings. We will be responsible for making your visit to XXYYZ-I as frightening entertaining as possible.
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See you on the dark side of the moon!
~The Sporks Team, Hikari and DancingToast

Thursday, September 23, 2010


This is soooo weird.
So apparently, my neighborhood has omnivorous ducks.
A thing about my neighborhood you should probably know about: We have a huge amount of ducks. They are fed by any residents and so, the ducks follow you around, wanting food. This is bad, as they poop on our patio (our patio has no screen). So MY family stopped feeding them, but not the other residents. The ducks still follow residents, hoping for food.

A very long time ago, perhaps one month, our family bought ham for sandwiches. Since it is one month, the ham probably went bad. So today, since I was the only one wearing pants, I went outside to throw it out. Two of the neighborhood ducks waddled over, following me. I made kicking motions toward them (I still love the ducks, because they are childhood memories, and their babies are adorable!! Once, the mother duck made a nest near our house, but unfortunately, a rodent of some sort lived under our slightly uprooted tree, ate the eggs, and had strewn all the eggshells at OUR patio. The mother duck never came back.) to ward them off, since it was pig meat. Once I threw the ham out, it didn't fly far, so I could still see the ham. It sank to the bottom very slowly. One of the ducks swam out to where it sank, dipped its head below the water, and FREAKING PICKED IT UP AND ATE THE HAM!!!!!! I mean, WTF???!!!!

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Sharkie said...